The Friend Request

I thought my non-relationship was going well. We spent every weekend together and had a fabulous time over Christmas. He painted a "future" of trips, new places to eat, and telling me that he "Liked me." I would reply that "I liked him too!"

Things were peachy until I received a Facebook "Friend Request" from a girl I didn't know.

I remember him being open and mentioning that he was dating her and I told him I was dating different people as well, but with this "request" I realized that I was starting to care about him more than I let myself acknowledge.

I told him about the "request" and he was surprised as to why she would do that, and that he was still dating her.

Was he sleeping with her? I became territorial.

Everything unraveled.

I knew it was over when at my birthday party, he texted that he was "too tired to come and was going to crash".

I understood, because everyone goes to bed at eight o'clock on a Friday night! Yeah!

So digging deep and finding the stalker inside, I piled all my girlfriends into the car and did a "drive by". Sure enough, an unidentified vehicle was parked in the driveway. Ha! I knew it! My stalker was satisfied.

Two days later he calls. His tone of voice is already mopey as I ask him how he is doing and slowly he whispers, "Ok." And says, "He's not ready for any commitment and that he is sorry but he is going to have to go with the other girl. But that I've been alot of fun." as I pictured him patting me on the back.

It took me about another three hours to have it sink in that I had been DUMPED!

I would like to scream "Jerk!" and horrible icky names to try and make myself feel better, but I actually feel bad that he doesn't know what he wants in life, as far as marriage and finding someone to be with. Even with everything I have been through I still believe in taking that risk and finding a connection. It's the greatest feeling to "love someone more than you love yourself"-Good Will Hunting.

You can stay the same with the same relationship of just "watching TV and having sex", or actually build a life with someone. Why not take the risk? The joy in life comes from doing things that scare us and excite us.

It's all in the jump.

Too often "love" is a rendezvous of superficial affection. Nothing gained and nothing lost. To grow as people we need time and getting outside of our comfort zones to form a deeper connection.

I hope that he finds someone that makes him laugh, challenges him, and helps him find the beautiful things in life.

"Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all."-Alfred Lord Tennyson